One For our Baptist friends

A religious joke to stir the pot.





Four men walking along a river bank when they came across people being baptized.



The pastor looks and asks: “Would you like to be baptized and freed from sin ? “



One guy looks at his friends and says “come on, it can’t hurt.”



The first man walks up to the Minister and is immersed in the river.



When he surfaces, the pastor asks “Have you found the Lord?”



He replied “No” and was dunked in the river again.



When he surfaces again, the pastor asks “Have you found the Lord?”



“No” he said again.



So the pastor dunks him a 3rd time and asks “Have you found the Lord?”.



Same answer, No.



Not to be deterred, the pastor dunks the man a dozen more times and after each attempt he asks, “Have you found the Lord?”.



Finally the drenched man replies “No. But are you sure this is where he fell in ?”...........!!

Yes, I enjoyed the joke, and I can do so as I am a 'member' in a Baptist Church, by my own choice, I am not putting the denomination down, yet I can laugh now, at the strange way I related in attempting to find God.

Firstly, I ignored Him, I treated Him like a block of wood!
He should do His thing, and I mine!
I began to realise, that I myself actually hated to be ignored.....so I reaised that God would be 'crashed off 'with me at this point.

So I was encouraged to look for Him in the very place He reveals himself!........and I learnt that He was a speaking,and relating God,.....and He has spoken thro His Prophets, in the past.....and thro His Son Jesus who came into history, to us, that we might understand what God the Father is like!

As we read about Jesus, his character, his attributes,his concern, his wisdom, he always had the correct answer to every situation, especially where others were treated unjustly. And He knew our very natures. And often I hated that fact. My secrets were mine alone!

The second way I treated Him was I had the affrontery, ...to tell Him how I should run my own life, and the world also, tho I blamed Him when He didn't clean up the mess that others, and myself were making in His world.
It was similar to lecturing a Dr. how he/she should opperate on me, when I have no idea of surgery proceedure.........!And sadly , had a similar effect,........I learnt nothing, yet kept asking the Questions over and over. Why is the world the way it is , why am I like I am, what purpose do I have, am I just a piece of sensitised meat? Why am I afraid of death?

Sadly, one can spend a lifetime searching for God, yet He is the one in search of us!
We only need to look in the places in which he reveals Himself'!He said "Those who seek after the truth will find it"
"I am the way the truth and the life, no one comes to the Father but by me'' "Try me and see that I am good"

Don't get fooled by Christians who think they are better than you, or me! God does not think that way, nor does He treat us that way.Christians aren't better, just different.
May I say, the biggest error that floods Australians is the misunderstanding that Christianity is about 'being good'! We are to practice morality, yet I need to accept that I can never be in a right friendship/relationship by me doing it, He God, has done it for me....His Son, came, lived among us, and was put to death,......He gave his life so that we might see the reality of what life is about, and He left death behind, and came back to many witnesses, to show that He was God the Son, our Lord and our Saviour......and we only need to look at the mess the world, our relationships are in , to know we need help!

Until we meet again, take care and be adventuress

Colin Spratt

Hi Gabriele,

As always beaut to hear you once again on the Wesite you keep updating, and I think I can say we all appreciate that fact.

It is an excellent question that you ask, and so easily answered,yet the answer does not begin to give due respect to the question. The complex answer is a profound YES! If I may put it like that!

11years of constant depression, anxiety,burnout, exaustion and grief, a Clinical Depression which never subsided,....there was little relief in sleep, as the Nightmares were indiscribable!.

And waking was JUST as cruel, as it would take me a full 3hrs to come to any resemblance of 'blackness', not normality.
I am not convinced one bit by those who show the real signs of polonged Depression,... not just sadness, a depressive illness, that removes ones ability to cope,..... that the thoughts of suicide is not a constant companion. So much so, a small child could lead you by the hand, and you would be 'almost' greatful..Even to shower or clean one's teeth wasn't worth the effort, and had no purpose.

Depression of this sort is deadly, and I new that if there was no relief from the agony within, that death was a welcome 'friend'.

In the Post on 'Laughing at ourselves', I spoke in the past tense, for of the future, as pitiful as my faith was, it was in Somebody reliable, God. Faith in itself is of no benifit, if the object of ones faith is unreliable.

We practive faith every day, I have faith in the chair on which I am sitting, it has proven to be trustworthy over a long time.
Now, I suppose I COULD,.. exercise my faith in a one legged chair, yet no matter how much faith I have,.....the reality is that it will let me down.

Or in another illustration,.. I could with faith leap out from a clifftop,..... and say " I will fly away.....like a bird!''

I'll fly alright,....but not like a bird!. And if you don't mind me saying so, the reality of that situation will crush me!

So, You have in fact opened me up for all to see, that the 'simple' answer is based on the fact that I could trust in no Dr, No Psychiatist, no Counsiller, or Phychologist and I was beyond weary of meeting them! I felt if I had to try to explain how I felt and how I was one more time, I may strangle them. Yet each played a part in keeping me alive, and I am greatful for, .....most of them. Let me hasten to say, many of them were reliable, and they did the best they could with the knowledge and medications of the time.

And to this day , progression in the treatment of Depression is still continuing with great success, thanks to those who have been given the skills to seek cures. I'm deeply indebted to a great many folk of whom I have never met, and to some I have.

There were a few who's brains started at the top of their heads and went...up!!!Yet most were dealing with a complex illness,...as is cancer, and other illnesses.
I am about to place a poem on the Depression Post, as it is extremely difficult to explain 'what it is like' to be Depressed.
I'de actually love to find another word, and perhaps someone brighter than me ( "not real hard, I'm a bit slow"), may provide one,...though I'm not sure a word could describe Depression, it is not sadness, though one can be sad who has the illness, ......well I wouldn't want an enemy to endure it, and for you who have, you have my true empathy, and for those who missed out on having depression.....you missed nothingness!

Hey Gabriele, you may not want to ask a long question. I appoligise for my longwindedness, but not for the content. Several medications and people kept me alive. The people know who they are. And eventually the advancement of medicine, anti- depressants. I am no longer stigmatised by having a depressive illness,though it has taken me on long time not to be.

Depression is treatable, and mostly curable. Thank you for listening. Take from this that which is helpful to you.

Colin Spratt

Thank you Gabriele. A faithful Friend indeed.